I hate unicycles!

I think unicycles are embarrassing and that people who ride them are neurotic. No joke, everyone who takes the time to learn has some kind of flaw. I just think people on unicycles look like desperate dorks hoping some other lonely dork will notice and be impressed by their “ninja skills.” Even clowns on unicycles seem like tragically failed performers who think kids will laugh when they lose balance or think anyone cares that they spent so much time alone learning how to juggle at the same time. I’d guess riding a unicycle is a strong indicator of depression. Pitiful.