esentcial

tools for the world we live in.dont know that if we didnt have to the tools the extremes would not exsist…circular arguement and what can ya do…i get on with the life that i have…my faith gets me here and idk survivor i suppose….i do feel like one. the endless extremes. ummm i can not see the future…nobody can…any number of events come together ... MORE

Posting equals accepting our rules and terms

angxity

i dont sweat the small stuff and everything is small….easy…angxiety is a natural flight or fight response and part of our bio. we werent meant to live in it constant mode. a combination of different approaches to different situations…then i have a nap. lololol…a combination of science and faith and idk knowing is a form of self defense. avoidence ... MORE

not a simple

thing….horrifying clinical and just saddddd….we are individuals and we suffer and rejoice in turn……one does not make the other better or worse. i feel like i should be in shock but not really feeling it…..dont see that as a good thing….humans weree not meant to endure such extremes…..

I just needed to spill everything

I want to cry and I think I’m having a nervous breakdown. I can’t be having one, but I am. I feel nervous, anxious, guilt is weighing down heavy in my stomach and making me choke and my heart hurts and is crushing me. I want to cry and it all hurts, my hands twitch and tap and scratch and scatter. I’m tired, I’m dizzy, I can’t concentrate I am procrastinating ... MORE

gezzzz

different directions…. the city bored…make work…idk but i did lolol…..

and really hate i do hate today….i hate alcohol…hate what it has done to those i love…i hate alcohol…..my heart breaks and sometimes it is too much to bear…..and idk…i dont want become a fanatic….i cant say what others chose to do and ... MORE

i do believe

people have walked paths i haven’t…dont know how if any have walked the ones i have. shrug…true of everything…i have certainly been places enough to know that damage and pain and sick live in some places…..sighhh i didnt make this world, i just live in it. crazy level has reasons and some people cant handle what is or could be or sighhh world we ... MORE

nature

the universe….truely drops ya on your ass…..but i believe in things higher than that……mind blowing for sure anddd i dont believe we were meant to have the answers, i dont even think we were meant to know the questions buttt then here i am….does still cause some cracklin but i am sure it always will…..some stuff aint for our tiny little brains….idk ... MORE

creeped out sighhhhhhhh

sometimes….the name game cease being funny and it’s creeping everybody out…:( i know it will fade in time and i try to ignore it….running scream from certain names probably not a good idea. sighhhhhhhhhhhhh…crazy stuff….but i bop along and meh what can ya do…time passes andddd next….

ummm i do have a passing need to snuggle ... MORE

Tumblr Bullies

On tumblr, in the twdg fandom, I was bullied by bluewalltack and hanndigo (formally lillycaul, then lillycaulproskater) to the point of almost committing suicide. Both of those people are some of the worse people I have ever had the displeasure of interacting with. They act condescending, holier-than-thou, have no self-awareness whatsoever, and act like certain people in the ... MORE

and some peeps

just evil little viruses….callem on it and they run….baaahhhhhhaaaaa…back atcha *10 anddd u have a good day….snicker…