i do NOT live in a nice place

i live in a place that’s sad and lonely and inhumain…doing what i can to change it, not have a stroke andddd enjoy it. i do NOT want to work from home.

i…am a human being

i can not and will not live my life in isolation…….i desrve hugs if for no other reason then biological…really this week i will take what i can get :(. do not know why peeps r so hard on me and it makes me sad…I AM TIRED OF BEING SAD….i am going to go out there and find real for live people….i see NO happy in the sky but landed could be ... MORE

hate to hope :(.

it is a struggle and having absolutely no idea of what to hope for meh not what is was for sure. i use to love to look forward to stuff…getting ready, planning andddd execution..where things land was always in question sooo idk…blow up fuck it mode. ignore and carry on aint much of a life…meh…..

do something that scares u everyday

i do…i get out of bed :(. sighhhhh i hope today is a better one. that was insanity over th top and i am sick of it. i would like to see my life after all the crap…i believe in romance and hugs and kisses and exploring the possiblities….would settle for a hug. maybe my expectations are too hi…….i see my life outside of this as light and fun ... MORE

somebody

protected me today….thank you and really have no doubt many did….but u know who u r 🙂 thank you i appreciated it.

huh……

what to do what to do….ahhh whatever comes next. i had an amazing week cept for the insane personal attack…what is wrong with people. and really round 2? i aint show up. it’s astounding to one it’s all the other guys fault and so on and so on till at the end of the day…they all blame moi. fabulous. meh i refuse to be abused and used and disrespected…i ... MORE

close as i can tell

more of a gong show than a circus. i suppose there r peeps who take all this seriously and think they make a difference….they fill our hospitals and homes….shrug. insanity the end result and i suppose some r happy enough. shrug. anybody who thinks they know wtf are fooling themselves….even those with the best of intentions idk even sadder as everything ... MORE

ya know

i dont think i am trying to attract anything, probably quite the opposite but i think it’s possible that i might ummm if i make my self more approachable/ available that i too could live happily ever after. then i laugh and laugh…..

certainly i have balance and ummm even in the crazest of circumstance it is in my view…somewhere. and no i dont think ... MORE

in what world is

on line annonymous i seriously dont believe that anybody thinks that. forsure everything we do easily traced , just nobody cares to do so. shrug. or i dont care if they do. excentric anddd a little off the beam who cares…..i do get a great majority do and prefer denial shrug…k….i do think the world is changing and i am a fossil…….i also deeply ... MORE

i feel stuff

i know it cause i am angry…..with reason and with in reason. i think most of my reactions r with in the normal range but then my life aint normal soooo hard to say. looking forward to suport and rest and contentment. really i cant keep dealing with endless garbage. i do not attribute anything that happens in my reality to anything but what it is. and rational….if ... MORE